every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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