Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
