C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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