she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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