After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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