we made out on top of his cat.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Randomize
