I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
