Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
We got so high we made milksteak
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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