on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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