I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Randomize
