Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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