It's Friday. Sex?
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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