You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
Randomize
