I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize