She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
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