my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Randomize