well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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