laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Randomize
