apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize
