At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize