did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
