just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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