Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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