She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Randomize
