I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Randomize
