some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
