Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Randomize
