haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
My nipple is on Facebook.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize