Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
