My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Randomize
