I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
