I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
i think i have herpe
just one?
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Randomize