What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
