She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Randomize
