I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
