great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
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