Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
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