We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
