nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
