I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
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