forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
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