I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
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