They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
