So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
