Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
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