She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
