Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Randomize
