But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Randomize
