Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
