you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
