toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
The feeling are messing with the penis
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
